I have been sharing on my Facebook and Twitter accounts that I have been yayaless for almost a month already. I even created a blog post about it here.
When the previous yaya of my toddler left us and advised me via text message only, I panicked. My elder son is more manageable and doesn't need a yaya anymore because he goes to school everyday and is now very independent. As you may have known it's because hubby and I are working full time out of home. My work schedule was affected because it meant having to go to work on a later time (thank goodness for allowed changed in work schedule) and even filing emergency leaves from time to time. All for the love of our children diba that we sacrifice these things to prioritize them.
My daily routine changed for the last three weeks. In the morning, I have to wait for him to wake up, which is around 8am, to be able to feed him breakfast, read books to him, play a little and give him a fun bath. Although I still stay with my mom, I cannot bear the thought of leaving my toddler unfed and still smelling like his morning breath, if you know what I mean.
In these last three weeks, I found great happiness and fulfillment for the simple yet loving things that I was able to do for him everyday, which I don't get a chance to when I go to the office early.
I laughed with him more.
I played with him more.
I read books to him more.
I played bubbles in the bath with him more.
I held his hands more.
I talked to him more.
I kissed and hugged him more.
I heard "I-LOVE-YOU-SO-MUCH-MOMMY!" from him more!
Just earlier, my toddler's new yaya arrived. I should be feeling relieved, I'm sure most would do. But honestly, I felt sad inside. Not because I don't want a helper anymore, but I will be going back to my old routine.
Lesser time to:
Hear "I LOVE YOU SO MUCH MOMMY!"
Now, I will be leaving him again every morning begging me not to go to work anymore. I will be entrusting him to a stranger.
Isn't it IRONIC? Don't you think?
More comfortable living, BUT lesser time with my kids.
Better performance and attendance at work, BUT kids waiting and missing me a lot.
Oh well, I'm sad the yaya arrived, but we can't not have one.
|Photo Source here|
Have you ever felt this way too? Or is it just me?