Happy 2021!  Wow I can’t believe that 2020 flew by so fast.  This year my ultimate priority is to ensure that my family and I have good health.  With all the health scare that’s happening around the globe, I realized that we only need the essentials in our lives, nothing more, nothing less.

What am I talking about?  I’m sure it’s the same with you all, first is to have a strong faith, maintain beautiful relationship with my family, and last but not least, family.  With this, I learned to live simply and be grateful for every little blessing that our family receives.

 

Made me think, wow, my priorities and what I perceived to be needs, adjusted to the changing times. Speaking of those perceived needs, they have something to do with luxuries which I really thought we needed.  I remember I was asking my husband to please buy espresso machine immediately, since we are both coffee lovers!  Every time there were sale activities via Lazada or Shopee or Amazon, and even other international e-commerce sites, I would excitedly let him take a look at those what I added to my cart.  I don’t know why it kept on delaying, then BOOM.  Towards the end of 2020, I was rushed to the emergency room of the hospital nearby.  It was my first time to palpitate due to too much caffeine in my system.  It was a life scare for me because it was a first for me.  So that espresso machine in my cart that kept on delaying, I let it go.  I was told to stop drinking coffee and other colored drinks for the time being while I was experiencing palpitations.

My husband also had a realization on his perceived needs and what truly are the essentials.  He actually wanted to purchase a new family vehicle after having been fully paid with our first family car.  But then 2020 happened and we all know what that meant.  It was as if the world took a pause for all of us to recalibrate, reset, and reflect on our lives.  Because of the pandemic, we set that plan aside, even if we were already set to purchase one complete with comprehensive insurance, and even found a really good motor deal here now, we didn’t press that plan.  We thought, there’s a right timing for everything, and besides, we still have a service we could use in case we need to go somewhere.  Funny thing, last year, the car wasn’t fully utilized because we didn’t go out unless really needed.

You see, even if we plan ahead, if God says it’s not what He wants for you, things will not go our way.  And that’s okay.  That made us consider to always have an analytical balance (if only that can be scientifically measured like how scientists do) on everything in our lives.  That balance applies to all our priorities, our needs, wants, the essentials, and also in human relationships we have with everyone we know.

How about you?  What were some of your realizations of priorities, needs, and wants?  Share them on the comments below.

Hello!  It's been a while since I've written something very personal on my first digital love - my blog.  I am glad I am typing away my vulnerability, openness, and honesty.  I may be someone you know or maybe not.  I maybe an inspiration to some, a source of strength and encouragement, but I am also human and just another regular mom - experiencing the same things that you do, day in and day out.

I recently experienced social media or digital anxiety - I'm not sure if there's such a thing.  But that's what I've been through these past couple of weeks.

To be exact, I felt overwhelmed, fearful, unsure, worried, insecure, and it seemed like all my efforts were not enough.  

I battled with all those feelings or mental state in the days and weeks that went by.  You may or may not notice it but if you know me well - you'd know that I took a break.

Yes, I was still present, but if you could read between the lines of some of my posts, you'd know there's something quite off.

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CARRYING A HEAVY LOAD? Mid-week thoughts from a busy, overwhelmed, peace-yearning, and tired momma. It's always the way we carry it, isn't it? These past few days, I've been quiet here and there. I'm carrying a load of all sorts. I've been re-chanelling my energies and attention to things that make me happy - my family, my plants, my small biz, my oils, my cooking, and also my Kdramas. I'm shying away from the noise, from the pressure some people put on another. I'm shying away maybe from you who's still reading this. It's not you, it's me. Haha. I know exactly why I'm doing this and my pausing and slowing down is intentional. It's the way I am carrying the load. It's the way I'm coping. I'll be back, stronger, happier, more energized, more focused, and more open. We all cope with what's going on in our lives in different ways. Let's cope and not give up. If you're tired, rest. If things are moving on a fast pace that you couldn't keep up, pause. If there's too much on your plate, select the healthy ones and save the others for later. Prioritize, delegate, you can even decline. The important thing is to cope. Lastly,never think you're all alone in carrying all the load, God's with you every step of the way. Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Matthew 11:28 NLT Have a great week ahead!

A post shared by LOUISE-Mom & Lifestyle Blogger (@mommypracticality) on Aug 12, 2020 at 1:04am PDT

I'm the person people come to for consultation, for encouragement, for good vibes, and inspiration.  I'm that person and yet, there I was needing those things I give to others.

No one really noticed, unless I kind of gave some clues through my posts.

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MENTAL HEALTH Do what makes you happy. Divert your attention elsewhere if you think where you are isn't working well for you or when what used to bring you joy now tires you. Step back. Pause. Detox. But don't quit. Don't lose hope. Just take a break. As shared in my last post on coping these days. I've been refocusing my energies on things that make me really happy. My family is already a given. Sharing with you what's keeping me busy these days in case you're wondering what I've been up to. I'm just here, just detoxing. There's too much noise, still getting used to it again. I am coping. I'm taking care of my mental health as well. So these past few weeks were spent most on learning new skills. I baked my first-ever choco cuppies, baked more chocolate chip cookies, tended to my lovely plants (to which I was baptized a new title by my husband at home - a budding botanist), my small retail biz (reselling trolleys and UV Care products), and my YL oils too How have you been loves? Hope all is well with you.

A post shared by LOUISE-Mom & Lifestyle Blogger (@mommypracticality) on Aug 12, 2020 at 9:43pm PDT

But that's okay, because I didn't battle this anxiety alone, I had an ally fighting with me - I have GOD.  I battled everything in prayer.  I wasn't really alone.  

The first practical thing I did to help me with my mental health was - Social Media Detox.  What is it?  My personal definitions are any of the following: 

• It's taking a conscious and intentional break from your regular social media groove to take care of your mental and emotional health.  
• It's a much-needed pause when you feel there's too much noise or things are going too fast that you can't live your real life.
• It's practically putting your depleting digital energies somewhere or to something else (before it becomes empty) so you could recharge.
• It's simply staying away from social media to be more busy with your offline life.

How Social Media Detox Can Save You From Anxiety And Depression

Sometimes in life, stepping back or seeing ourselves from a different perspective is healthy.  It will make you realize many things, assess where you are and where you want to go, it will let you discover that YOU ARE MORE THAN WHAT YOU THINK YOU ARE, and that whatever happens, whether you decide that you want to exit from the digital limelight or press on, that YOU ARE ENOUGH and that you are where you are for a PURPOSE.  

So if you feel overwhelmed and exhausted, take a break and detox from what stresses you.  Don't quit, don't lose hope.  Breathe in deeply, breathe out.

Then carry on.

Kamusta mga mommies?  What are you feeling right now?  Bored?  Worried?  Anxious?  Sad?  Confused?  Fearful?  Depressed?  Desperate?

Whatever you are feeling right now, let me assure you that all of your feelings are valid.  It's okay not to be okay.  We are human, we have feelings and we can be weak.  Take time to relax and recognize all your feelings, accept it, and feel it.  But tell yourself that you need to do something about it.

Source

With the global pandemic and extended enhance community quarantine we have all been either struggling or easing our ways to adapt to the new normal.  Not everyone welcomes this with open arms especially those who are on "No Work. No Pay" status.  It's a difficult time.  This is why we need to really try our best to stay positive during the quarantine period.

WHY?

They say, what we feel, think, affects how our body’s immune system.  Just like food is to the stomach, our thoughts and feelings are to the mind and heart.  You become what you eat, what you think, what you feel.  Feed it well, you’ll be well.  Feed it negatively, you get sick and that's the last thing we want these days right?  Ayaw natin magkasakit.

From the individual recovery sessions I attended in the past, I learned that out of everything that’s happening around us, 90% are uncontrollable (such as Covid-19 outbreak, loss of projects or jobs,  accidents, and even how other people relate to you or treat you).  You can only control 10% of your life which is basically the following:

• How you accept and feel about people and things.
• How you respond to what’s happening around you.

Given this, I believe that you are the master of your thoughts and emotions.  You have the power to succeed or fail, the power to be joyful or grumble, the power to be content or complain, and the power to feel at peace or worry.

Here are some proven and tested things you could do to stay positive during the quarantine

FEED YOURSELF WELL.
Choose healthy food to nourish yourself and help boost immune systems.  This also is applicable to the news and articles you read on your Facebook or IG or Twitter feed.  Learn how to FILTER what you absorb your minds and hearts.  Usually, these don’t help in keeping you calm or stay positive.  You may check in every now and then, but try not to overthink or over-analyze because you’ll only panic, worry, and be anxious.  Feed yourself with positive and inspiring content that will either make you laugh, inspire you to do good things or be busy, and move you care for yourself and your loved ones more.  It helps also if you have something daily to read such a devotion book or app.  I use YouVersion Bible App.

MAKE A THANK YOU LIST.

Source

Write down all things you are thankful for.  This ECQ made spending more time with our families possible and it’s healing our mother earth from all the pollution we give her.  More than what you wish you have, think about everything that you have right now and write them all down.  Write down what you’re thankful for each day.  Start and end your day with a grateful heart by creating this habit.

BE BUSY.
To keep your minds from wandering and getting too affected due to the number of rising positive COVID-19 cases in ou country and even globally or to simply kill boredom, look for things to do in the house.  This extended ECQ brought anxieties to many, that's why it's important to keep yourselves busy.  Apart from usual chores, you could do activities with kids, finish the scrapbook you started 5 years ago, make a new skincare routine, master the art of lining your eyebrows (because kilay is life!), learn something new, organize your closet, or you can binge watch KDramas.  Do something you love or at least something that interests you.  I’ve written about 100 Things To Do At Home during quarantine.  Check it out.

HELP OTHERS.

I had the opportunity to volunteer to cook for our frontliners through BrandbuzzPH

If you can and able or if you have extra funds or savings, support and help fundraising causes organized by different private sectors.  One example is Brandbuzz Helps.  it's a community of mommy bloggers and social media influencers headed by Gie Ramos, that pools funds and even donations in kinds from individual or group donors and brands, to support as many frontliners as it can.  I donated and also volunteered to cook breakfast for ou frontliners through this wonderful community.  It really felt good and fulfilling to be able to help others.  Science says, doing acts of kindness such as helping others in any way you can, produces Oxytocin.  It is also called the love hormone that helps lower blood pressure and improves heart-health.  Helping others also increases self-esteem and optimism, which are all extra helpful in managing anxiety.


PRAY.
Cast your burdens and worries to our waymaker, miracle worker, promise-keeper and our light in the darkness - our God Almighty!  Let’s recognize that God is in control and that He alone can heal and stop this pandemic.  Sharing with you my favorite Bible verses that comfort me in time of worry.  In Matthew 21: 22 it says “You can pray for anything, and if you have faith, you will receive it.”  Lastly, He said, “Fear not, I am with you, I am your GOD.  I will strengthen you, and help you, I will hold you up with my victorious right hand.” Isaiah 41:10. 

Source

This ECQ has made me realize a lot of things such as what is really important in my life.  That not wealth (which I don't really have), fame (I also don't have), success, achievement, position or profession, and connections could save me should I be infected with the virus.  I will not call upon anything and anyone to protect me and my family or to heal me - but God's name alone.  I will only call upon the Lord to take my wheel and steer it according to His will.

We are not really sure when this will all end.  Not unless a proven and tested vaccine or medicine will be available to everyone globally that we could attain peace of mind that we could all be safe to go back to the "normal" we were used to.  But for now, let's do all we can to abide by our laws.  Let's stay home and pray for our government to make the right decisions for our country.  While our ECQ has been extended and I believe will still be extended until end of the year, let's do our best to stay positive as we all stay home.

I've been on and off social media these days which isn't the case for some moms I know. Why? Maybe because they think there's nothing else better to do.

Wrong.

Being on enhanced community quarantine due to the Covid-19 pandemic could really make anyone get bored easily.  If I still am an office kind of working mom, I would definitely feel the same way!  It's different when you're used to going out every day for work compared to someone (like me or most work at home moms and stay at home moms) who sees community quarantine quite similar to her daily life (except the freedom of going out anytime).

I've read so many rants or funny comments from moms not knowing what to do for the rest of the quarantine days.  That's why I came up with a list of 100 things you could do during this period.  You may be doing some already, but feel free to read the other things on the list in case you come to a point when you don't know what to do next. 

Here it goes:

1. Start a daily devotion.  I use Simple Joys App (free download on Play Store or App Store).
2. Set a weekly family meeting to ask how they are doing.  Ask the kids what they understand about what's happening to our country and the whole world due to the COVID-19 pandemic.  This is a teaching moment for parents.
3. Write in your journal daily. 
4. Start an "Answered Prayers" notebook to teach you to be more grateful each day.
5. Start a blog or a vlog sharing what you're passionate about.
6. Read blogs or watch vlogs that inspire you and bring value to your life.  
7. Finish that scrapbook you started 5 (or more) years ago.
8. Organize your family or children's photos on your phone, desktop computer, cloud storage, CDs.  
9. Layout these photos for a nice photo book or print them on large canvass materials (Photobook PH has these!) the printing you may do after the quarantine.
10. Organize your personal files on your laptop or desktop computer.  Want to purge files?  This is the best time.
11. Do some art projects you've been dying to do but have no time such as but not limited to macrame, cross-stitch, painting, and crochet.
12. Read books or finish books you've longed to finish.
13. Cover your books with the leftover plastic covers from last year.
14. Manicure/Pedicure at home.
15. Foot scrub/foot spa yourself.
16. Teach everyone at home how to wash hands properly and thoroughly.
17. Create a Spotify Playlist of all your favorite songs (songs from teenage years, songs that uplift you, Praise and Worship songs)
18. Netflix and chill - I started watching K-dramas/Series and I never went back.  Current loves: Crash Landing On you, Kingdom, Something In The Rain, and Itaewon Class.  Also watch Money Heist, Elite, and other Netflix original movies. :)
19. Edit the travel or milestone videos on your phone or computer.  I use InShot for Android phones.
20. Download educational and entertaining apps for your kids' tablets.  Check each app your child uses and discern if you should uninstall or retain on the gadget.
21. Defrost and clean your refrigerator.
22. Take out all the dinnerwares from your dish drainer and clean it as well.
23. Use those nice plates, and utensils you've kept for special occasions. They are not to be kept anyway.  Life is too short to reserve beautiful things for tomorrow.  
24. Remove the hiding accumulated dirt in your washing machine.  You have to check in between the silicones/rubbers to see the dirt.  Remove and disinfect as well.
25. Konmari your closet.
26. Organize your closet apart from folding your clothes nicely.  Segregate to keep, to give away/donate or for selling.
27. Organize your husband's and kids' closets and rooms too.
28. Revisit your makeup and skincare products' expiration dates and throw the expired.  If you have too much, give it away or use them.
29. Practice putting on make up especially your eyebrows, kilay is life!
30. Start a nightly skincare routine if you have none.  If you do, start using the face masks you got as gifts last Christmas.
31. Satisfy that #PlantTita spirit in you.  Start caring for existing plants at home.  Talk to them, water them, make sure they are given enough sunlight exposure.
32. Grow a sustainable garden.  Easy to plant and grow are: Eggplants, Okra and Saluyot.  You may also try ginger, tomatoes, kangkong, malunggay, and ampalaya.
33. Rewrite your mom's or grandmother's recipes.
34. Revisit your family's financial budget or plans and see if you're on track or deficit.
35. Start populating an expense sheet and a budget tracker.
36. Discuss financial planning with your husband.
37. List down accounts receivables and schedule of remittance or payment.
38. Hang your small children's artworks on a dedicated wall mural.
39. Re-arrange your living area or dining area.  This is applicable to your bedroom and kitchen too.
40. Create a TikTok account and start filming funny videos you, your family and friends could laugh about to take your minds off the pandemic.
41. Share your TikTok funny videos on social media. 
42. Redecorate your room.
43. Redecorate your children's room
44. Call your parents and siblings and ask how their families are doing.
45. Reconnect with old friends.
46. Make new ones.
47. Make amends to those whom you may have hurt in the past.
48. Forgive those who had hurt you even if they didn't ask for it.  You're setting yourself free.
49. Write your husband a love letter.  Rekindle your beautiful love story together.
50. Start a home workout to keep fit, try yoga, weight lifting, and cardio routines.
51. Spread COVID-19 news and words of encouragement.  Please validate and make sure it's not fake news or something that would spread fear, anxiety, and worries.
52. Donate to our frontliners (hospital workers, military and policemen) and the homeless through different and legitimate organizations.  One is Brand Buzz PH.
53. Share on your social media accounts donation or fundraising drives organized by different communities, groups, establishments, companies, etc.
54. Sanitize your house especially frequently held/touched surfaces like doorknobs, staircase railing, switches, ref handle, etc.  I used UV Care, alcohol, bleach, and sanitizer.
55. Change your bedsheets and pillowcases.
56. Change curtains in all rooms.
57. Try baking easy recipes.  You may use your oven toaster or turbo if you don't have an oven.
58. Get some morning sun with the kids, just step out of the house.  This does not necessarily mean you have to go out in your neighborhood.  
59. Prepare your family's Emergency GO Bags in case you haven't done this.
60. Charge all existing powerbanks in the house and all other rechargeable small appliances.  You'll never know when you'll need them.
61. Advance your weekly menu-planning.
62. Cook your husband's and children's favorite meal.
63. Teach your kids how to cook.  Pancakes for little ones and easy viand recipes for older kids.
64. Start using your expensive planner/s (you redeemed for buying all those cups of coffee!).  Sell or give away your extra planners.
65. Calendar all your billing due dates (teleco, electricity, water, internet, insurance, health cards, memorial plans, etc
66. Teach your children some physical games you used to play as a child (that most probably they have no idea how to play it today) such as piko, patintero, tumbang preso, pitik-bulag, luksong-tinik, Chinese garter, chinese jackstones, etc.)
67. Teach boardgames and also card games to your child (Snakes and Ladders, Connect 4, Sungka, Memory Game, Pekwa, Ungguy-Ungguyan, and many more).
68. Learn your kids' games too and even lingos (have you heard of Roblox, Minecraft, Subway Surfer, Uno, etc.?).
69. File your kids' artworks and put their age or date they were made.  Putting them on a clear book is a nice idea.
70. Teach your kids some easy household chores appropriate for their age.  My toddler could throw trash in the garbage and pack away his toys.  My school-aged son can wash the dishes, sweep the floor, and help me with laundry.  My eldest is the official dishwasher, clothes folder, can do the laundry, tidy up his rooms, and run errands for me.
71. Do arts and crafts with the kiddos. There are many free printouts you could find on the internet.
72. Polish your wooden floor and furniture.  This can also be considered a workout for us moms!
73. Polish your jewels.  I use and highly recommend Kurin Water.  
74. Revisit all your PIN numbers/codes of your different accounts.  You may be forgetting some or some of your accounts may be compromised, so for security, change your PIN codes or at least try to remember them.
75. Revisit all the policies you've bought.  Take note of documents needed for claims, write down due dates, list down policy summary, etc.
76. List down important details about yourself and all the important assets you have, should anything happen to you in the future.
77. Wash your make-up brushes and tools.
78. Clean all your bags.
79. Wash or polish all your shoes.
80. Stitch your children's names on their handkerchiefs or towels.
81. Support a friend's business or blog or vlog by visiting and liking their websites or pages.  
82. Take your support a notch higher by purchasing their goods or hiring them for their services.
83. Take your support another step higher by promoting them to your other networks too.
84. Write your own dreams.  It's never too late to dream big and make it happen.  That's what I learned from Robert Kiyosaki.
85. Update your resume or Linked In profile/info.  
86. If you're a blogger/content creator like me, create a media kit.  A media kit contains information about yourself, your brand/blog, your stats, past projects and brand partners, awards, recognitions, and features.  
87. You could also create a rate card.  For all design needs, I use Canva.
88. Enroll in an online course or join an online activity or webinar on topics that interest you.
89. Plot your loved ones' and friends' birthdays on calendar.
90. Create signage at home as visual reminders on the following: Sanitation, Conserving Water, Garbage Segregation, Kids' things to do, etc.
91. Answer fun surveys on IG and share them on your stories.
92. Watch and support live concerts or shows online.
93. If you have talent in singing or playing an instrument, why not perform live too?
94. While you're at it, you could start your own fundraising event online as well.
95. Get a complete 8-hour sleep.
96. Listen to Praise and Worship songs, especially when you feel sad, worried, anxious, uncertain, or confused.
97. Read the Bible and get to know more about Jesus.
98. Memorize some biblical verses.
99. Share inspirational verses to loved ones and friends.
100. PRAY.

Recently, I celebrated my first year anniversary as a Stay-At-Home-Mom!  WOW!  I know, it's been a year since I turned my back on corporate world!  Sometimes I ask myself, has it really been a year?  Seems like yesterday and memories of my last day in the office are still fresh!  Well, yes, it's been a year and time flew by so quickly that I didn't notice a year indeed had passed.
I know you may ask, do I miss working?  Do I miss the adrenaline rush when I manage and launch nationwide projects?  Do I miss dressing up and fixing myself up to go to the business district of the metro?  Do I miss my co-workers?  Do I miss being busy and having a routine?  To be honest, NO I don't miss any of those (except for very few friends I made during my working years).  If there's one I truly miss, it's having a regular salary with attractive benefits which I receive twice a month.

Do I regret my decision and miss having a regular and stable job?  No.  I never regret leaving corporate at all.  Some of the people I know who tried to be a SAHM and weren't successful or dreaded staying at home told me, "Louise, in a few months, maybe weeks pa lang, you're going to miss working, your corporate life.  Baka malosyang ka sige!"

I could choose to be offended with that statement or just let it pass and prove that being a SAHM do not mean I will let go of myself and get lost in the pile of dirty dishes or mountains of clothes to wash.  I fully understand where they are coming from.  Why they thought I would feel the way they felt and had to urgently come back to the workforce.  That is their story to tell, not mine.  I could easily tell you too that a SAHM life is not for everyone.  But that would be too selfish because I would make it appear that being SAHM is exclusive.

Instead, I want to share how I prepared to become a SAHM.  This chosen path is my obedience to God's design for the family - become a submissive wife to my husband, take care of my children and manage the household.  You can't just wake up one day and decide I just want to stay at home instead, just because your work sucks or your boss is a slave driver or your colleagues are too gossipy or judgy.  If you plan to leave your jobs to be a SAHM someday, you really have to prepare yourselves spiritually, mentally-psychologically-emotionally, physically, and even financially.

SPIRITUAL
Every family life's major decision should not only be discussed with your husband but also be prayed about intently, whole-heartedly, and with obedience.  Praying about this decision helped me and my husband decide that it was finally time for me to leave behind my life as a corporate life. We prayed for it for a year.  There were many triggers and situations that led to my resignation.  We've lost a number of yayas, I was exclusively breastfeeding, my second son's behavior wasn't doing great.  God made all these things happen to help us decide about my resignation.  When God's message became very clear to us, obedience was in order.  That's why when I passed my resignation letter, I knew I was ready and my decision was rock-solid.

MENTAL-PSYCHOLOGICAL-EMOTIONAL
Being a stay-at-home-mom is not as easy as others see it.  I never knew how MORE exhausting and draining it is to be a SAHM.  Now, I breathe it, attest to it, and tell everyone that work at home is non-stop.  At the same time, home environment with loads of work ahead, and without a helper, is totally different from the office.  From a clean office desk I come to daily to a house which is  most of the time a mess when husband and kids leave me and my toddler for work or school.  I made adjustments and adapted to the new normal.  I mentally condition myself that there will be no more regular meetings to attend to nor team huddles to discuss my ideas or report my accomplishments to, no colleagues I could ask to come with me for coffee.  It's hard.  I am all by myself, no adult around to converse with but my husband when he comes home from work.  All the work and exhaustion absorb all the energy and positive vibes in me.  I go crazy at times and I have no one to express the bottled up frustrations, weariness, worries, loneliness, and even occasional self-pity.

When I reach this point, I seek help from my husband by taking a day-off, it's usually Saturdays.  I get support from other SAHM friends, I ask prayers from my friends from church community.  And because I am a blogger and a digital persona, I also connect with my mom blogger friends online.  Self-care is definitely a MUST - it's one way of coping with all these negative feelings towards yourself.  I cry it all out privately and lastly, I pray.  Prayers really work all the time.

Staying at home could affect a mom's mental health, there's even a condition now called Stay-At-Home-Mom Depression - it's real.  What are causes of this depression?  Lack of recognition and appreciation, over fatigue, and having no income could trigger this.  Want to stay at home?  You have to prepare for this big leap of faith.  But know that there's a greater God who will send you His angels to keep you sane, keep you safe, keep you motivated, keep you hopeful, and keep you energized so you could give your best to the best persons in your life.

PHYSICAL
There are so much to do in the house when I became a stay at home mom.  When the last yaya left, we intentionally didn't get a replacement anymore.  I did everything from laundry to dishes to mopping, carrying the garbage, cooking, and taking care of the kids and my husband.  Being a SAHM is a tough job which most people take for granted, ignore or even belittle.  With everything that's happening at home, a SAHM needs to make sure she's in tip-top health to endure the daily draining tasks.  I also have to possess high levels of immunity because if I get sick, nobody else will care for my kids.  My physical exhaustion resulted to three things, one, I lost weight; two, I felt stronger each day; lastly, I learned to delegate tasks to my husband and kids.  The new normal sat pretty well with me and my boys because even if we didn't have a helper, they are happy to see me at home and personally do things for them which usually other people do.

Speaking of physical aspect, prettifying myself wasn't a priority anymore.  I rarely go to the salon to have my nails done nor the spa for a regular massage.  Sa bahay pa lang kulang talaga ang oras and when you have a clingy and still exclusively breastfeeding toddler, you can't be separated that long.  When I have time on Saturdays, my day off, I do self-care.  Now I understand where the notion that SAHMs become losyang.  I make sure though even if I don't get to date myself that often, I don't let myself go.  I bathe everyday and smell good, I make an effort to dress up when going out and apply make-up (#kilayislife) too.  Staying at home taught me to be more selfless and part of this is letting go some of my personal agendas in the beauty department, because I'd rather spend time (and money) with my husband and kids.  I've also become less of the physical world, because my new world now revolves around my family.  Staying at home taught me simplicity and contentment.

FINANCIAL
This may be a sensitive topic for some but I want to point out that this is one of the major consideration should you plan to stay-at-home.  From two income generators, my husband is now the sole provider, the breadwinner.  I couldn't thank him enough for all his hard work, for providing for us, for stepping up in his role as a husband and father.  It wasn't easy at first.  Imagine, our family was living comfortably.  All our family's needs and wants were given - when I was still working.  But you see, it isn't always about money.  The kids need me more than what we could materially give them. They are the reasons why I resigned, our growing boys.

All kids naman should they have a choice, they'd really want their moms to be at home instead of working.  Let's focus on a a regular family unit, one that has a father a mother and child or children.  It's a different ball game for single moms or when incomes of both parents still can't seem to make ends meet.

To prepare, make sure you have savings and had set up an emergency fund. This emergency fund should be 6 months worth of your salary or household expenses.  You could build this while you're still working.  Set aside 10 to 20% of your salary monthly to go to this fund which you could use for rainy days or when you decide to quit your job to give way to staying at home.

My husband and I listed down all our monthly household expenses, that includes bills, food and groceries, transportation and communication, and even leisure expenses.  You should be doing this religiously so you know if you're still within your means or going over your budget.  When we assessed that we can do a one-income generating route, given his monthly take home pay, our emergency fund and savings, my part-time jobs - we decided I stay at home.

I realized that I had been spending too much on unnecessary expenses while I was still working like daily coffee and doughnuts, lunch outs, and impulse shopping.  While staying at home, I only spent for basics like regular groceries and food.  I saved more staying at home because I didn't have to spend for daily parking fees, set weekly gas budget, salary of a yaya, lunch outs, and expensive coffee.

I guess what's important is we never let financial challenges create misunderstandings or rift between me and my husband.  It was a mutual decision and a choice we prayed for, if anything goes wrong, we shouldn't play the blaming game.  We're both accountable and we are partners in making this route work.  We also know in our hearts and have a strong conviction that God is our great provider and we wouldn't have survived a year with just one regular income.  God's grace and provision paved way for extra income for me through blogging, some opportunities (which surprisingly just sent my way) so I may save on some expenses, and of some business transactions that will enable us to help others and glorify Him more.  Trust in God's plan - that's what we do.

Staying at home, may or may not be for you.  It's a big decision to make. Being a stay-at-home mom shouldn't be frowned on.  One should never say when asked what her work is with "Sa bahay LANG ako" or with "Stay-at-home-mom LANG ako."  Be proud of being one.  It's harder than a regular office job.  I know so because I've been a working mom all my life until this major life decision.  Staying at home one is an obedience to God's design for every family, and with that alone, He will never leave you nor forsake you.  Because of this decision, I became more focused on my priorities, my husband stepped up in his role as our family's provider, and he's become more loving and sensitive to our needs.  I became more selfless, simpler, though yes more exhausted than ever, but more fulfilled than ever.  Lastly, I became more prayerful and thankful for the gift of my life and my family.

~ Are you a stay-at-home-mom?  How's being a stay-at-home-mom?  How did it change you?  How did you prepare for it?  Why did you decide to become one?  What are your challenges?~

As a young child, I grew up knowing I have parents who love me and give everything I need and some wants.  I have brothers and cousins I used to play with.  I remember feeling secured and happy.  Until I went to school.
I still vividly recall up to this day how a classmate in Kinder teased and insulted me for not knowing what the color of the tree was.  I knew it was green, but I colored the leaves blue.  Not because I didn't know it should be green, but because I couldn't find the color green in my set of crayons.  That was the first time I felt disliked, rejected, unsafe, and insecure.
Unknowingly, it was the start of finding and shaping my identity through others' opinion and set of standards.  Call it peer pressure or pleasing others or just plain desire to be accepted and liked by people outside the family.  And I was just four years old then.

I have a morena skin and was sporting a short hair.  My classmates were mestizas and had long hairs adorned with pretty ribbons.  THEY became my standard of beauty.  So I asked my mom's help to grow my hair (used a lot of Gee! Your Hair Smells Terrific shampoo thinking it would help grow my hair faster) and put the nicest ribbons.  I had always felt ugly and insecure back then.

Looking back, and now that I am a mom myself, I realized how important it is to fill the LOVE TANK of our kids at home so that when they go out there in the wild (the unsure, the unknown, the critics, and the unforgiving real world) they are sure of themselves, they know they are loved, they know they are pretty or handsome, they know they are kind, talented, smart, they know they are enough being themselves because he/she is unique, and that he/she is fearfully and wonderfully created by God.

I used to blame my parents, especially my mom, for not making me feel beautiful or not doing everything she can to protect me, especially I am the only daughter, the only rose among thorns.  But now that I've come to know Jesus and that I've become older and a lot wiser through God's grace, everything was clearer to me - and I don't blame anyone at all.

NOT EVERYBODY WILL LIKE YOU - And that's okay.  That's what I have come to realize and this is what I also want to teach my children.  I know God's purpose for my resignation is to prioritize my ministry which is my family - my children.  He gave me a chance to correct my mistakes, make up for lost times and opportunities to show and tell them how much they are loved, and that they are enough.

Here are some things in my heart to teach and tell my boys:
To my teenager:

• You are good looking and those pimples will eventually go away. 
• You are making big progress in your basketball skills and that's something to be proud of.
• It's okay not to have a girlfriend or an MU even if your peers are already into a relationship.
• Never let clothes, new phone, new shoes or any material things define you.
• It's okay to not have too many friends.
• You are a responsible child and a good brother, keep it up.
• You have been very helpful to us, thank you.
• You are loved by us.  But God loves you the most.

To my grade-schooler...

• You are making progress in socializing with other kids in Sunday school, keep it up.
• You have a big and wild imagination, keep on creating things.
• You have an exceptional drawing skills for your age.
• You are so different from your Kuya, but we love you just the same, like how we also love your baby brother.
• You have a big, kind, and compassionate heart.
• It's okay to not be like others, because you are special, you are unique in your own way.
• You are loved by us.  But God loves you the most.

To my toddler...

• You bring joy to our family, you are like a glue which makes us all stick together.
• You are a good entertainer and you amaze us each day.
• Your learning skills in speech is so cute, you will learn to talk eventually.  Know that whatever you say, we understand you, your needs and wants.
• You have an exceptional driving and running skills.
• Your imagination this early is wild, keep on exercising your mind.
• You are the only one who exclusively breastfeeds from Mommy.
• You are loved by us.  But God loves you the most.

MY CHILDREN - the world will have many expectations from you.  Expectations to keep up with the latest fashion and even gadget trends. Expectations to like what they like such as music artists, games to play or cartoon characters.  Expectations to have a girlfriend or a crush at a young age and engage in things (worse, vices) not appropriate for your ages.  Expectations to be cool or popular or stand out but not by doing what is good but what is different and harmful or hurtful to other people.

Mga anak, you don't need to meet those expectations.  You don't need to say, do, act, or have things just to be LIKED or to be popular.  Because honestly, you don't really have to make an effort to meet expectations just to be liked.  The fact is, not everybody will like you, and be rest assured, that is okay.

In our eyes, in our thoughts, in our hearts - YOU ARE ALL ENOUGH, and YOU ARE ALL LOVED.  We appreciate your presence in our lives.  We are thankful to God for bringing us such wonderful gifts that we don't deserve.  We are proud of who you all are.  We also acknowledge that no child is perfect and that's why we accept and love you just as you all are.  BUT as imperfect parents, it's our duty to raise up God-loving young men who will start their own families in the future and lead their children through their examples.  May we be able to show and teach you those examples well, through God's grace, even if we are imperfect parents to all of you.

But you know who accepts and not only likes but loves you the most?  God.  And He is enough.  Remember, not everybody will like you - and that is OKAY.

Oh what do you know, it's already 11:00am and it's the first time I sat for more than five minutes.  I haven't done this in a while (sit, face my laptop in peace, and write/blog - for as long as I can without interruption).  Welcome to my new normal.

I don't know if you would agree with me when I say that deep inside as a woman, we believe that we can do so much (sometimes we think we can do even more than some men - aminin!) to contribute to the society, earn our own money, be independent and self-sustaining, and be leaders and succeed in the fields we choose to be in.

Having our own money makes us feel secured and fulfilled, tama ba?  That's why, the moment we stepped out of college - we looked for jobs or entered a business venture, climbed the corporate ladder, and fulfill our career dreams!

That's exactly what I did!   Even when I became a mom the first time, the second and third time - I took on an 8 - 5 job (even rendered more hours than that actually!) to help support the family's monthly expenses, send my children to school, and help sustain the budget for our growing family's needs and wants (gifts, play dates, parties, travels, and many adventures!).  And while I earn more and more each year, I also spend more and more TIME AWAY from my children.

Working Mom Sacrifice: TIME AWAY  from my children
That was the sacrifice I made.  TIME AWAY from my children.  It worked out for almost 20 years in the corporate world - so I thought.  It was okay with my eldest because when he was growing up as a child, I was still starting with my career which meant I can get off early from work to come home to him right away.  I was still young and full of energy which also meant I had a lot of active play time with him.  Though I wasn't making much then, simple fast food dining in or free play in some playgrounds made him beam with so much joy.  He grew up happy, confident, and secured.

When my second child was born. my career was starting to blossom, I also got a promotion and though I was still young and had the energy, time wasn't enough.  I had to stay longer in the office.  I traveled frequently and stayed longer outside than at home.  I was earning better because apart from my office job, I also started blogging and earned a little, I started an online business, and I pursued my TVC career as well.  I could pretty much say we had more resources when my second son was born.  But TIME with him was compromised - and I REGRET it today.

Our family was more financially secured when my third child was conceived and born.  We had a lot more resources, I also enjoyed performance bonuses at work, my blog was earning better too, and I do other sideline projects here and there.  We had something to spend but our energies were decreasing.  In addition to that, since both of us are working - we were just repeating the same pattern as what happened to our second child.

During this time too, we've become Christians and we can say that our relationship with God has improved so much.  He saved our family from the cycle of living just to survive without having a solid life and after-life purpose.
How did GOD do that? He prepared and saved me personally from potential family damage that I may cause by not spending time with my children. He is sovereign and He knew that I will be led to resign, so He did all these things to prepare me for this new life journey:
- By putting my 3rd pregnancy at risk - He did this so I could slow down, stay at home until I give birth and get a feel of what's it like being just at home all day for three months.  He made this happen so I could see how happy my kids got when they find me in the room waiting for them, instead of the usual them, waiting for me.

- By letting me have an emergency CS - As if the three months OB-ordered bed rest wasn't enough, the 2-hour 10 cm delivery became an emergency CS, so I could stay longer at home with my newborn and the kids, and master breastfeeding.

- By letting me choose to exclusively breastfeed - By letting me have a longer maternity leave, I was able to exclusively breastfeed my baby for three months.  In that three months of breastfeeding by demand, I've seen how beautifully a woman's body is created that we're able to feed our offspring.  That made me decide to commit to exclusively breastfeed my baby for one year.  Going back to work was a challenge especially after staying at home for about six months (bed rest plus maternity leave).  To pump at work two to three times a day is a commitment and I saw it as God's way to make me feel closer to home even if I was at work.

- By letting us lose our yaya three times last year - We fired the first one, the second, third, and fourth were temps.  The one that came back after her vacation, just left without any notice.  this situation left me with no choice but to take leaves (finish them even sick leaves actually) to be able to stay at home and care for the baby.  This led me and my husband to seriously assess our situation.  Should I still stay or should I go now? We prayed really hard for this, the first time we did, God's answer was "not yet."  Then last December, it was clear, God's answer was "Yes, it's time."  So come January this year, I resigned from my 10-year job.

- By showering us with projects last quarter of 2017 - I just surrendered everything to God this time.  I admit to getting anxiety attacks during the first 2 weeks after my husband and I decided on my resignation.  But I prayed more and just put all my trust in Him.  I know I am doing everything to glorify Him.  I know I can never go wrong with the very reason why I was resigning - for my children - my real life's ministry. Without any replacement job, most would say, I am crazy.  Leaving a very stable and well-compensated (complete benefits pa) job without any plan?  That's crazy, but for me, it's obedience to what God really wants for our family.  And by just obeying, I soon realized, how God planned this for me.  He gave me  projects during the last quarter and every paid project will be my receivables for the first up to third quarter of this year.  I mean. wow God!  You're so full of surprises.  He's impressed on me to just really put my trust, put all my faith in Him that He will provide, He will never leave nor forsake me, and that He has plans to prosper me and never to harm.

BAHALA NA SI BATMAN - NO!  BAHALA NA SI GOD! 
So now, I am more than a month unemployed and I am loving every moment of it.  I seriously didn't plan this.  I even told a colleague my 2018 plans at work and how I wasn't going to resign anytime soon or that I would probably wait until the company retires my service.

Grabe ang galing ni God because when God wants something for you, even if you plan something else for yourself, God will make a way to make things happen.  Nothing really happens by accident.  All you have to do is to obey, be faithful, and trust that God will provide.

That's all I did.  And I've never been happier losing a full-time well-paying corporate job without any replacement than this phase in my life.  I am with my children almost 24/7 because there are still times I go out for events and meetings.  I get to blog whenever I want without feeling guilty.  I am now able to fulfill my homemaker dreams.  I am now able to pursue other passion projects I will later on reveal.  I also feel that God is preparing me more for something great.  I just don't know what exactly, but I know He is.  I've been living lighter, stress-free and praise God for letting me leave my corporate life.

So there's my resignation story.  :)  Are you a working mom?  Or also resigned like me?  Or a full-time mom working at home and chose to leave corporate a looooong time ago for the kids?  How's it been?  What's your story?  I want to hear yours and learn as well.  Please do share. :)

Happy new year to all of you supporters and readers of my blog.  How was your new year's eve celebration?  Ours was just as simple as having Media Noche together as a family and simply welcoming 2018 with a bang!

So how was your 2017 loves?  Personally, I can't say that 2017 was an awesome year for me but it was a year full of breakthroughs, yaya challenges, milestone celebrations of my children, blog struggles (a long phase of writer's block but more of the passion took a vacation somewhere, but is now back baby!) career plateau and 10 year mark, and the unforgettable renewal and total surrender of my life to Jesus Christ.  It was an Ups-And-Downs ride for me this 2017, and it definitely taught me important life lessons and had reset my perspective on many things to ready me for this year.

I want to share them with you and I hope you also get something out of these personal realizations of mine.

But first, let me share a throwback of the year that was through some photos I have shared with you via IG or my Facebook page throughout the year:

First time Damien ate solids! :)

First family photo of the year.

Enchanted Kingdom where I tried a liver-flippin' ride for the first time.

IndustreeTV shoot

Damien's first beach trip. :)

Mother's Day with kids doing something we all love - SWIMMING!

Damien turned ONE!!!!

My husband turned 30 something - lost count na!  Hahahaha!

My first born turned 14!  Waaahh I can't believe how fast he's grown!

A milestone 7th birthday celebration of my second son.

Bataan family getaway

I turned a year short from 40. :)

A life-changing retreat attendance with my son Wes and my public declaration of my total surrender to Jesus!

Looking at my photos, I also realized that I've focused a lot on my family.  I celebrated every milestone and I also prioritized them most often over everything.  There were sacrifices made and compromises done to some areas in my life but I never regret and will never ever regret making my family my priority.

Now let me share with you what I already knew in the past but was impressed to me more last 2017.

1.  Prioritize Family Always
I've dealt with numerous yaya problems last year which made me take almost all my vacation and sick leaves from work or do a work from home stunt just to stay at home to take care of my baby and do all the house chores.  My career and even blog was compromised because of the indefinite helpless situation but those didn't matter that much to me as much as it did in the past because I know my priority is my family. My family is my ministry.  Well, the office and the bloggy world will always have someone/anyone to replace me, but I will always and forever be irreplaceable to my husband and children.  I've learned not to adore my job too much that I sacrifice the welfare of my children.  But this didn't mean I slacked in office work or even with blog, it just took a backseat a bit but was still able to deliver what needs to be done.  Job will come, money will come.  But the time which passed, the milestones of the kids you missed, the health, safety and welfare that's compromised - once they're gone.. you can never go back in time and get them all back nor rewind them.

2.  Submit To Your Husband
I admit to be a stubborn, a bit bratty, proud, fearless, know-it-all, self-reliant, independent woman who finds her husband an equal - BEFORE.  Until my husband and I renewed our relationship with God and attended our weekly DGroup meetings (a small support group for couples to share both blessing and struggles of every day in marriage and family who come together to learn more about God and align hearts to what God really wants for us), I learned a lot about the important roles of the husband and the wife in the family.  I was guilty of not submitting to my husband and following his leadership for the family.  I used to be too proud to say that "I can actually live without him..." or that "If he can do it, so can I!" and the mahaderang asawa lines could go on and on.  I am not proud about that.  But I am glad that I've changed my ways and perspectives on marriage and how I look at my husband right now.  I submit to him now more than ever.. and there's more peace, happiness, tolerance, and patience at home now more than ever.

3.  Health Is Wealth
Just like prioritizing family, we should also prioritize health.  How will you be a wife to your husband and take care of your children while they are young if you're ill right?  Never take health for granted.  As moms - homemakers or working moms, we tend to take on everything.  We tend to say, "I can do this!" or "Ooops that spot isn't sparkly clean yet, let me tidy some more!" or "I have to finish all the tasks on my to do lists." and so on and on.  And not to mention, we wake up early in the morning, do chores, go to work and stress out, suck in traffic blues, clean the house again, and sleep late.  Yun ang culprit, PUYAT and PAGOD.  Both are enemies of our health.  If you're tired, it's okay not to pick up and organize all the messed up toys.  When we tend to do so much and don't get enough sleep, we get tired easily, we get stressed, and different sicknesses kick in.  When it does, REST and don't say "No.. it's all in the mind I can do it."  If you've got health card, use it (abuse even!) and have yourself checked.  For women, get vaccinated against HPV, do self-breast-examination regularly, see your OB-Gyn doctor.  Healthy food and exercise should also be part of our TO DO lists.  I think I am telling this to myself out loud.  Personally, now that I am nearing 40, sometimes fear lures around the corner because I have a breast mass which needs to be checked via sonomammogram every six months.  Having a tip-top shape healthy body  should be every moms' priority. And by healthy it doesn't mean just losing weight but more of being strong.  So that's my goal for this year, to get back to eating more fresh colorful foods (fruits and veggies) and avoid bad cholesterol.  Again, health is wealth.

4.  You Win Some You Lose Some
Sure you didn't get that promotion or nailed that presentation to get your dream client or in my case I wasn't considered in some projects or collaborations with brands that I hoped to represent or be an ambassador of.  If I were the old me, I would feel a little jealous of others who got the promotion faster than I did or others who got the blog project and would compare them to me.  Ask WHY NOT ME?  But nah, that's the old me.  Though I'm not really full on envious of others victories, I am not perfect and I humbly admit that to these mistakes.  You know what happened to me?  Self-esteem was blown away, self-doubt rushed in, and I even questioned my relevance.  But I changed the way I look at all these things and was able to move on from things I didn't get or achieve and just celebrated the things that I did.  When we pray to God for something, (and please remember God is not a genie that we only call on to when we need something hehe!) never question his answers because He may say Yes, No or Later.  Why?  Because He always has something BETTER for us, trust me!  I know.  So you win some, you lose some, and know that it is okay. :)

5.  Learn To Let Go Of Some Friends
 This may be one of the hardest to do sometimes, to let go of people in your lives who do not bring you or give you value, who belittle you, who were never happy when you achieve something, and who do not bring you close to God. Not all relationships are bound to last.  Those whom you thought you've found gems in them may lose their luster.  Those you've trusted with your all and sold it to others behind you aren't worth your time and effort.  Those who can't afford to be honest to you no matter how much it may hurt and didn't even bother to give you the answers you needed when asked, no point in continuing the relationship.  When you lose friends or end relationships along the way, it's God's way of pruning, molding, and directing you to the path He wants you to take.  Some friendships or affiliations don't always work and do not bring Him glory and thus there are unexpected E-O-Fs or F-Os (End of Friendship or Friendship Over) along the way.  Accept it with grace, let go of them, and move on.

6.  Forgive Even Those Who Didn't Ask For It
 To them who had done you so wrong, who had hurt you, who betrayed you, who bullied you, who took you for granted, who left you, who didn't stand up for you - it could be your mom or dad, any of your siblings, your best friend, an ex, your colleague, and even your spouse, don't harbor hatred, it will make you look older, prune bitterness in your heart, turn it to resentment and let it affect the person you are to become.  Sometimes pa, we may not know it but we are in denial saying that we've forgiven a person yet will never forget what they have done.  When we forgive, we forgive totally.  We let go of everything that comes with the pain or hurts or brokenness we experienced with that person or persons.  And even if these people do not ask forgiveness, okay lang, forgive anyway.  You are doing this more for yourself and for the Lord.

7.  Surrender Your ALL To God
Early last year, my husband and my eldest attended a retreat organized by CCF (Christ Commission Fellowship). Last December, Wes and I attended CCF's (Christ Commission Fellowship) True Life Retreat where we both deeply understood how much God loves us that He sacrificed His own Son to save us from our sins so we could all receive the gift of salvation when our "time" comes.  I used to just hear and accept those words casually and didn't fully understood them deeply.  We've also been attending services in CCF more regularly as a family since the start of the year.  Since then, one answered prayer after the other happened.  I didn't say challenges in our marriage, kids, work, and financials didn't occur anymore.  Of course they did, but our spiritual maturity has helped us cope better, accept these things better, worry lesser, fight lesser, be convicted quicker when we did something wrong or not so good, and this made us forgive more openly, and apologize immediately.  Our prides are still being crushed because we're still works in progress.  My husband is now more intentional, he's more patient to me, he's more thoughtful, he's now saying SORRY (which is a very hard thing to say for a man most of the time right ladies?) and he has stepped up in leading our family closer to God.  By surrendering to God and lifting up all to Him (everything talaga, challenges, triumphs, frustrations, anxieties, worries, bitterness, as in everything!) our family life has changed all for the better.  Our relationships are more knitted together, communication is more open, we pray together at night, my relationship with my husband has improved, my outlook in life has been more positive, and the past hurts and brokenness had been slowly taken away.  There's no way to go but UP with God!

These are the lessons that were impressed more to me this 2017.  These aren't new but every year because of my spiritual growth and maturity, I look at these lessons or topics at different perspectives.  All I know is I am happy to still be alive, to have renewed my personal relationship with Jesus, that my family and I are healthy, safe, and together, that I am less stressed and less worried, that I am more focused, and that I've never felt so alive!  I've also never felt so much loved by my family and of course by God.

Cheers to an awesome 2018!  Thank you for your continuous support and love for my blog.  Happy new year to everyone!